Being your beloved has suspended me
in a void of dismay;
so uncertain is time and its crooked self.
it prowled and encroached
sans a twitch of air, and
I was being hunted much before I knew;
Or was I? I don’t know…
Something was there-
misty & warm,
clear yet hazy between me and you;
befuddled I was & yet I had thought that
it would come and go;
and then began this ‘something’s’ doses
through a furtive vein,
amidst acceptances & denials,
assertion of will & will nots;
swearing as if everything was normal
doped in the aura of normalcy.
The blood of mine thus,
Betraying me, oblivious when I was,
overturned the tables!
The slices of my conscience & brain conspired,
and the room which had been locked
was blown open & scavenged.
The trickling began thus,
and to my nerves it clung-
like an enzyme to the food,
antigen to erythrocytes;
My own plasma made slave my mood,
and fanatically loved my cells,
yet being peculiarly rude.
Tampered the lock was,
wreaked havocked the room,
and I failed to see,
that the conspirator was right there-
IT began to rule me
By being fused with my mind;
Addicted I became
to this friendly fiend.
I had not paid the slightest heed,
that me myself with it had allied.
The cloak was shed
and the symptoms revealed;
victorious at last it was,
succumbed when my plethoric shield,
and made you my parasitic beloved-
my sinfully desired!
The Tick-Toc of the clock now counts my breath;
my frail insides not even ashamed of the conspiratory deeds
leaving my wiled self aside,
and bathe in that victorious tide.
detached when it would be from me,
this ‘nicotine love’ would succeed to commit my murder!